Keep calm in the face of Prince William and Kate Middleton engagement rumors

I would advise everyone to stay calm and remain seated. Resist the urge to go to your nearest store and buy the latest issue of OK magazine with William and Kate on the cover. Slowly take your hand away from your purse/wallet. Ignore your Google alerts about an upcoming announcement in November and don't read too much into Kate's no-show at Gatcombe Park, where William demonstrated his prowess by taking photos with his phone.

These stories are just red-herrings because there is no real news about William and Kate (Oh, where is Tina Brown when I need her to illustrate my point?). We can be forgiven for jumping to conclusions, scoffing at these stories while reading every word. After all, what else is there to do?

But as you resist, you become stronger. Capable of reading between the lines of William and Kate stories.  For instance:

1) William and Kate photographed together in actual close physical contact/appearing together at a significant event (Read: They're still together. Phew!)

2)  William and Kate in close proximity looking serious. (Read: Not a good sign, but at least they're in the same frame)

3) Kate smiling enigmatically on the cover of Hello! (Read: Hello! is grasping at straws). There could be any number of reasons why Kate is smiling. It's a facial expression she'll have to lose when she marries into the royal family.

4) William or Kate photographed in separate situations - he at Gatcombe Park, she carrying mysterious rolls of paper while looking determined. (Read: Going about their lives as separate individuals. Or Kate has diagrams of Gatcombe Park to infiltrate the event. She failed.)

5) The cover of OK/Star Magazine showing pictures of William and Kate, with the headlines 'A Wedding Just Like Diana's!' or 'William & Kate's $40 Million Wedding of the Century!'    (Read: Nuff said!)

6) Stories about Kate working. (Read: Don't insult our intelligence)

7) Kate pregnant with William's baby (Read: Don't start knitting just yet)

8) Kate cheating on William (Read: Well, can you really blame her?)

9) William and Kate are related (Read: No worries. Keeping it in the family is a royal family tradition)

10) Specific predictions for engagement announcements and wedding dates (Read: Someone is using the Magic 8 ball again)

© Marilyn Braun 2010

Is Letizia expecting?

While there has certainly been no announcement of a third pregnancy for the future King and Queen of Spain, purely coincidental evidence leads me to believe that Letizia Princess of the Asturias may be adding to her family. This is based entirely on the fact that Crown Princess Mary of Denmark latest pregnancy was announced last week. The royal lives of Mary and Letizia have run on parallel courses since the very beginning, with Mary trotting ahead of Letizia in all family milestones by only a week or so each time.

ENGAGEMENT: 24 days difference

The much-anticipated engagement of Mary Donaldson and Crown Prince Fredrik of Denmark was announced on 8 October 2003 while the engagement of Letizia Ortiz Rocasolano took the world by surprise on 1 November.

WEDDING: 8 days difference

The Danish crown couple marched to the altar on 14 May 2004, but still made it to the church on time to see their Spanish counterparts get married on 22 May.

FIRST CHILD: 16 days difference

Mary and Fredrik welcomed the first addition to their family, the future King Christian, on 15 October 2005, while Letizia and Felipe's firstborn, Infanta Leonor, was born on 31 October, amidst speculation about whether Spain would change the laws regarding succession so that she, as a female, might be able to become queen. (The laws, incidentally, have still not changed.)

SECOND CHILD: 8 days difference

The Danes were thrilled by the arrival of the first Danish princess of her generation with the birth of Princess Isabella to Mary and Fredrik on 21 April 2007 while Spain celebrated another little infanta on 29 April to Letizia and Felipe, who named her in honor of her grandmother Queen Sofia.

NEW BABIES?

The Danish court announced last week that Crown Princess Mary is not only pregnant, but expecting twins in January 2011. This certainly ups the ante for Princess Letizia. Judging by her latest photos, it doesn't look like she's entered the baby stakes again yet. But, in order to stay competitive, she must not only conceive quickly but doubly! (Incidentally, Mary is also just seven months older than Letizia and Fredrik is four months younger than Felipe.)

Royal Focus: Princess Diana's Wedding Dress

When people attempt to describe the wedding dress of Diana, Princess of Wales, the words voluminous, iconic, meringue, fairy-tale tend to be used. But it's difficult to put into words the impact of it both on fashion and on the memory of those who watched Diana alight from the carriage, as if a 'butterfly emerging from a chrysalis'. Unlike any royal wedding dress before or since Diana's will always be in a league of its own.

The dress, designed by David and Elizabeth Emanuel, took four months to make and was made of ivory pure silk taffeta. The bodice was fitted and boned with a wide frill around the curved neckline. It has embroidered lace panels on the front and back. The sleeves are full and gathered into a taffeta frill at the elbow with lace flounce underneath. The skirt of the dress as full, worn over a crinoline petticoat consisting of many layers of ivory tulle and trimmed around the waist and hem with embroidered lace.

The train, trimmed with lace, was 25-feet long - the longest to date.

The veil, measuring 11 1/2 foot by 40 foot, was hand-embroidered with 10,000 3mm mother-of-pearl sequins. Diana wore the Spencer family tiara for something borrowed. The something old was a piece of lace from Queen Mary, and for something blue, the Emanuel's hand-sewed a little blue bow into the back of the dress. The couple also added a tiny,golden horse-shoe made of 18-carat Welsh gold, studded with diamonds, sewn into the back of the label of the dress.

Diana carried a large, cascading bouquet. On her feet Diana wore slippers by Clive Shilton. Trimmed with lace from the dress, and made of silk duchess satin, dyed to match the color of the dress, the shoes had 542 mother-of-pearl sequins on each pair, each knotted by hand. The fluted heel was made of bits of leather and wood and the soles were hand-painted with the letters "C" and "D" entwined with a heart.

© Marilyn Braun 2010

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